‘Due South, that’s the way I’m going,
My guilty pleasure. My husband indulges me this tune on our VW camper van drive back to Valencia, the place we now think of as home. I LOVE this song with an irrational passion. My sister and I used to watch the show every Tuesday evening as kids, on BBC2, and sing the song as the credits rolled over snowy Canada. Despite my love for this theme tune, I don’t listen to it very often because I simultaneously want to laugh and cry when I hear it. I laugh, because of my excitement for this ridiculously cheesy song. I sometimes get a little teary-eyed (no, not for the afore-mentioned reason) but because the lyrics ring true with me, especially when we first left to move to Valencia.
It’s that feeling, which becomes more of a wrench after every trip home (where is home?) The feeling of being torn between the home where those I love dearest live, and the home where the sun shines every day; where I feel happy and healthy. After several weeks in England, the desire to stay there, so I can see my family without using my passport, is tempting. This feeling battles with the knowledge of why I left in the first place. Having moved back and forth between mainland Europe and England several times, I believe that you cannot go back; you can never really go back. Not because things change, but because you change. After living a different life abroad, you go home and feel a little bit foreign in your own country. The novelty soon wears off and your feet itch once again.
I’ve written before on the bittersweetness of being an expat/immigrant/traveller, call it what you will. We are fortunate enough to have a good group of friends here in VLC: some Spanish, some from little old England and a few from further afield. There’s a camaraderie that comes from us all knowing the highs and lows of this lifestyle. And one of the lows is summed up perfectly in that cheesy, Canadian theme tune from an early 90s TV show:
‘You know that you must leave here,
but you wish that you could stay.’
Due South strikes a chord in me. I know the feeling that Jay Semko sings of and that is why I love listening to it, every now and again. I mean, I REALLY LOVE listening to it.
Sorry. Not sorry.